I was really excited to write about finding your passion, I had all these ideas and the generic 5 ways to find your passion, but then I sat down and started to remember my own journey on finding my passion. I thought my passion was to be an actress, I was going to be a big, big star and I loved it. I showed up to every audition, rehearsal, curtain call and thought "This must be my passion!" and then one day, things changed and I started to feel passionate about interior design. I loved all my classes on color theory and art history. I now imagined my life in New York, working on big penthouses! Not too long after finding my passion for interior design, I got tired of that and started to look into architecture…you get the point. I had a lot of “interests” but I hadn’t found my passion. Foreshadowing; the moral of the story is, you don’t find your passion, it finds YOU.
You see for the next several years, I had many interests but none of them woke up my soul to stay committed. I would get frustrated as I watched my friends find their heart’s desire and master it and receive acclaim and success from knowing their soul has been set on fire. Until one day, I was talking to a colleague about life and he mentioned he had a life coach. I was immediately intrigued, this was before “everyone” was a life coach. This was in 2010! He told me how she had changed his life and he wouldn’t be where he was today without her. For the first time in my life, something was lit, a small flame but it was there…I knew I wanted to change a person’s life for the better. I knew I wanted to help people live a more fulfilled life and I had no idea what that meant or how it would look from that point on. But that is when my passion found me, on a sunny day in Nevada at an Olive Garden, she walked up to me and just lit a match saying "From this point on you will be in service to the human soul."
So, instead of how to find your passion, I’m letting you in on the secret of how to wait for your PASSION to find YOU.
- BE honest. Sit down and write down everything you want out of life. Travel, money, health, wealth, and then write down everything holding you back from what you want. At first, when you are writing down everything you want it will feel generic, to travel the world, to lose 10 pounds etc. Keep writing, eventually it will lead to more soul deep needs like, deeper connections and to lead a life of passion. Now, writing down what is holding you back is hard, to be honest, because it will feel like we are beating ourselves up. Don’t beat yourself up, once we face our obstacles we can start working on them.
- DON’T believe the hype. People will tell you that xyz will make you happy, it won’t. You see, other people’s desires do not make us happy. Find your own happiness by listening to your heart and not social media, you BFF or some so called “guru”. Spend 5 minutes a day with your own thoughts and ask yourself, what do I want out of today?
- BE patient. Don’t rush the process, find things you love in the mean time and throw yourself into them. Throw yourself into drama class, planning trips, try a new work out class. LIVE YOUR LIFE. Don’t force it because you want to get started yesterday. Your passion has impeccable timing, trust it. Trust your process.
- GO WITHIN not without. You see our passions tend to find us through our own personal experiences. You have to go within and look at your own history, family make up, heart aches and successes. You have to have breakdowns and breakthroughs and then face what you needed to learn in those down times. You have to examine heart break, self value, core values, standards, all of your emotions and what motivates you and what distracts you. And just to be repetitive, you have to really be honest with yourself.
- LEARN TO LOVE YOU. This is the hardest and most important thing to do while waiting for your passion to find you. You must learn to accept and love yourself. You stop believing what the world is saying and start designing the way you want to show up in the world. We are brought into this world feeling unconditional love and then we learn conditions from our family, friends, and society, we have to unlearn them. I was once told that I laugh to loud by a friend. He said it so nonchalantly and for years, I was self conscious about my laugh. I would muffle it or apologize for it. 7 years ago I made a commitment to myself that I would learn to love myself and I use every opportunity to use my loud laugh and I believe it brightens a moment instead of diminishes it. I decided how my laugh would serve the world, you get to choose too!
If you look at the advice above it all can be summed up by just doing the things that make you happy, self reflect, be curious and ENJOY life because once your passion finds you, it is in the driver's seat. You are driven by it, every decision is made to serve it and you live on a new level of purpose. Its a beautiful time in your life to be in your passion but the “in-between” time can be A LOT of fun!